These are the thoughts that spawned in February 6 2012. I sent it out to my Yoga students:
I saw this quote & I wanted to share my thoughts with you. But first the quote:
I saw this quote & I wanted to share my thoughts with you. But first the quote:
"Indeed our hearts are golden treasures, but a true tragedy would be to conceal your inner gold because you are afraid of someone stealing it or it falling and breaking. There is no love in fear. The great wisdom of the ages always tells us the more we Love the more of it you receive. Love is not a giving or a taking, it is a state of being - a one way street of allowing, accepting and holding a space for all things to be exactly as they are. Fear not that your heart will be broken or stolen. Love becomes love. Give it away with no expectation of return and soon you will be having a love affair with the whole world!" - Jackson Kiddard
In order to offer love in whatever form, it has to come from somewhere…
When it comes to the topic of ‘love’, my biggest thoughts follow a trail on the topic of loving others to the roots. Where is the place that this love comes from that we offer to others? Do we offer it, or do we give it because we need it in return? Therefore, why is that ‘need’ to be loved there?
I don’t have every answer to the broad topic of all things love, and I’m pretty sure everyone’s thoughts will be different, but to me the following makes sense.
All I know is what I have experienced. All I wanted was for others to love me. So, I behaved in the ways I thought others would approve of. We all do it.
There came a time in my early 20’s were that need for acceptance become a life-line for me, why because I felt UGLY!… but when that life-line only extended so far… I looked in all other directions before I was forced to look behind me… okay not quite behind, more like in the space before behind and in front of the front (yes, I just deliberately said it that way). I call that the inward place AKA our inner state of being.
Obvious right? Yes, easy to find ‘cause we’re in our heads all day, but difficult to deal with or clean up that space.
And once you start poking around in there … Well, it’s like a messy & miff bedroom that seriously needs to get the Clean House crew from channel 183 in; but way worse! You just want to shut that bedroom door up!
You have to be a warrior and shift, toss out, let go, let in… and all these processes mostly happen in your head. It’s the internal conversations you have with yourself which stem fromself-imposed & maybe not so self-imposed beliefs about who and what you are. As for the part about: “…accepting and holding a space for all things to be exactly as they are….” Well, what I think about that place is; acceptance of the process because everything is already there. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be on your journey… Often we get impatient and then quite, or we go in full steam ahead only to get spat right out, perhaps that is part of it too.
So how does this relate to golden love and letting it shine? Well… stay with me here; that golden light that emanates from your golden heart cannot be seen buried underneath all that dirt of the things we choose to hide it under. That state of ‘being’ love that the quote talks about is there! We’re all capable of being that more consistently, but there are things that need a little cleaning first.
What are those things?
I can come up with a few of my own examples… self-sabotaging thoughts like: I am so young but so ugly after the birth of my child, I have no formal education, I’m really not good enough to do this, what do I have or know & how dare I even think that I have something to offer anyone? I am not intelligent enough, I never follow through with anything that is important to me, I’m so forgetful, I’m so obnoxious, too loud, my parents weren’t there for me, I don’t really have a home, I have no money, I am not thin enough, pretty enough, fast enough, strong enough, I’m too soft and people walk all over me, I am so different and never really fit in anywhere, my grammar and spelling sucks (thanks God for spellcheck!)
The list would literally go on for pages if I had to continue that same old broken record that has the same thousands of tragic songs that get stuck on play too often. And you know what I’m talking about here because you have your own record collection. These records we play to ourselves affect the way we treat ourselves, others and the way others treat us.
My point is; that no consistent real love can be offered to others until we start cleaning up our‘inward’ space. Until then… we just borrow the love that others are borrowing themselves most of the time. Until you become aware of that inward space, and get curious enough to look inside, clear out all the garbage, (because you know something valuable is inside there)… we are really just thriving, dependently on others to feed us ‘something’ we can actually produce and expand within ourselves. (That was a long sentence; you might need to read that again.)
And I’m going to describe that ‘something’ as this: Self-Love!
Once you clear out that inward space a little, you’ll find that golden heart, you’ll display it for all to see and share it because you now are sure of what you have to offer is enough to sustain you and have more than enough to give away freely. To me this is what the state of ‘being’ love is.
Warning: this is a lifelong relationship you’ll have with yourself… perhaps the longest one you will ever have! You can’t divorce or dump yourself… but you can ignore it and treat yourself badly. Who wants a bleak connection like that; surely not you?
Where do you start to when clearing out this inward space?
Here are some ideas:
- Learn to just connect with your breath! This simple, simple… (in fact too simple of a thing to really pay attention to) tool is a great distraction for these broken records, ‘cause it forces presence.
- The mind needs to be told who’s boss, and that’s you! Train it, meditation is a good place to start.
- And an even more obvious way to get to that ‘inward’ place is through asana practise (posture practise) for many reasons, but the most obvious one is to draw out the challenge of discomfort (mind) and reigning in the focus… over all the noise of the “I cant’s”!
- These first three are pretty powerful tools to have and they work!
- My next suggestion is this: cultivate a relationship with yourself. Take yourself out on dates! Do something that feeds your interests! Start with an hour somewhere during you hectic week, no one else (leave the partner, hubby, girlfriend, crushes, wife, children, dogs, cats, friends etc. behind), just YOU! Schedule it IN your diary! Tip: plan what you are going to do as not to waste time and thought during your hour!
Last thought on the topic: What you have to share from that inward place is pretty darn big!...!!!
AND when you take care of yourself first; everything else will come right in-line with what you’re doing (but you already know this!) You might even shine your light so brightly that it will spark something in someone else… After all, love is meant to be shared!
Happy LOVE month to you!
Other M.A.Y. announcements:
Did you know M.A.Y. offers a reward program? If you bring along 5 friends to yoga class, you will receive a 10 class card, values at R500 (valid for 1 month) for Free! So get talking… get networking
I’m planning on posting short YouTube videos for you guys to practise some awesome yoga at home when you can’t get to class. Here I am going to encourage you to send me your requests for the things you would specifically like to work on & know more about. So please send all your requests to email@example.com with the words “Mad YouTube Yoga request” in the subject line. (just so that I know where to save these away in safe space).
A BIG THANK YOU!
I am so grateful for all the wonderful new faces I have met this past January! Thank you for taking the time to come to a class. The classes have not always been full as a self start up yoga space, but
with your support and kindness, M.A.Y. has the potential to grow, spread and become a welcoming sanctuary for all those who are brave enough to face themselves on the mat. It's not easy, and you guys are real warriors for returning, because really every time you come, you really become your own master by facing and pushing through all kinds of fears and doubts, whatever they are!
To all those wonderful people who have connected with me on Facebook and phone calls! I hope to meet you soon in person! Thank you all for your encouragement and support! Now get your Asana (booty) down to class.
You are going to love learning new insights into mindfulness and movement.
Please continue to show your support, by encouraging your friends to come along to class with you, to join the Mad About Yoga Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/madaboutyoga
and remember to just talk about it. This would really help spread the news that Mad About Yoga exists! In this way; I am able to keep classes running, sustain a living for myself and keep offering my hearts deepest desire: which is to offer the best yoga I can to you... Let's make a wonderful community of wonderful, authentic people in cape Town!
That concludes this month’s newsletter
I hope to see you on the mat soon again & I look forward to meeting many of you yet!
Mad About Yoga
Head Mad Yogini